Where are your heroes now? Have they left you for good? Your life-giving ritual of checking our blog to ponder the existential questions we pose is the reason for waking up. Our blog is your alpha and your omega. How dare these omnipotent beings revoke this fountain of youth from humanity. Well, we had no option. We are so remote now that they are running on potato internet. Potato internet doesn’t work.
This morning, we drudged to Cape Town’s airport to fly to Johannesburg, transfer by car to a smaller airport, and we boarded our charter flight to Botswana. It was only the gang and our pilot, a hot-6-cool-7 guy who totally laughed at all of our jokes. We were even “upgraded” to a larger plane when our original one was having engine problems. Why does this keep happening to us? Either way, the flight over was pretty bumpy, and I was so scared that I came to make friends with the turtle poking its head out of my rear end on each bump. To our surprise, the local airstrip is 1. Paved 2. Has an immigrations window, and 3. Is not protected/ haunted by armed, tall, cloaked figures from your nightmares. Botswana is dope.
Hopping in the safari vehicle, which looks like church league basketball stands taped to your grandpa’s truck, we rolled through the savannah towards the lodge. Just during this drive, we already saw zebras, elephants, impala, things that look like chickens, and plenty of other exotic wiener dogs! The lodge is beautiful, the staff is nice, and it really promotes an inviting, communal feel. We quickly went out on a safari ride and met up with another couple from the states.
Our new ride-or-dies, Mike and Chris from New Jersey, are each a little over 5 feet of northeastern boisterousness, plumpness, and kindness. At first, Mike’s jokes, all puns with animal names in them, we leading me towards challenging a leopard to a cage fight, but they really are sweet. Within 20 minutes of driving, we found and got to watch a honey badger for a long time. Apparently, they are super rare to see, especially for an extended period of time. We parked very close the animal’s hiding place, but honey badger don’t care. Honey badger pop his head out, look around, show his hella scary claws, then go back and take a nap; honey badger don’t care.
Immediately afterwards, we went to watch a leopard that was perched high in a tree. Those animals are nothing to mess with, so what do we do? We park literally 2 meters from it and stare at it. She even poised herself and starred at Josef like a snack. Looks like even the animal kingdom knows that Braunfisch boys make for delicious, nutritious, low-carb snacks. They must have asked the ladies ; – )
For dinner, we all hung out around an open fire, ate with our OG squad 4 lyfe, Mike and Chris, along with our guide Bashi, and we are off to bed early. There’s literally nothing else to do, and we are heading towards a sunken blind to spot animals at a watering hole at 5:30 in the morning. Fingers crossed for internet…
Wanting to slip into dream world,
Hans “Let’s all sleep in this big bed,” Josef “I thought this was gonna be boring, but it’s really fun,” & Christian “Can we play the jambox on the safari drive?” Braunfisch